“Life is a luminous halo, a semi-transparent envelope surrounding us from the beginning.”
Life is messy. It’s imperfect. It’s chaotic at times and then (hopefully) life feels just right, even if just for a few minutes.
October could easily be described as that for us. We started the month off flying to Indianapolis for the LoveYourBrain training and it seemed that the month just wouldn’t slow down from there. I have known for months that I had over extended myself in October and had been bracing myself for it’s chaos. I even stepped back from a long term commitment I made to a friend because I knew I wouldn’t be able to give him the time my commitment would need during October, but alas life was still messy. Chaotic. Perfectly Imperfect.
I spent a lot of time asking myself why I did this to myself. Half the things I agreed to do I knew would make my life insane, yet I didn’t say no. Have you ever done that? Don’t get me wrong, each thing I agreed to brought a lesson to me in some way. But, I strayed from my boundaries and what happened was I quit doing one of the things that I do routinely to take care of myself personally.
Over the summer I found something I like to do to work out, in addition to yoga. It makes me feel strong, invigorated and energized. We traveled a lot throughout the month of October and when we were in town my life was crazy busy with tasks. My mantra for the month was “just get through October and then you can rest.” As the month wound down, I found myself exhausted and emotionally feeling down. I wouldn’t say I was depressed, but I think if I hadn’t got back in my routine of self care I could have slid down that slope. I just kept putting off my work out because the time I had that wasn’t devoted to all these things I agreed to do I could stay home and do nothing. Although, that didn’t seem to make my spirit feel better.
This morning I got up and peeled myself away from the Hallmark Channel (who by the way is already showing Christmas movies) and went to my class. By the end of my class I found that I felt great. I had energy. I felt good about myself. When I got home I sensed my insides were smiling with happiness. Perhaps I sensed my luminous halo.
What have you let go that makes your insides happy? What tasks or life roles have you taken on that made you believe your personal self-care should come last or not at all? When will you devote time to self-care?